| back & forth |
January 18, 2014 @ 12:11 a.m.
And yet

       I may not want to share old entries, but I certainly am here to share my past. Maybe a little of the present. Thing is, I don't share. I do not share me. And mother says I have to. Mother says grandmother kept every thing inside and that is what gave her cancer. And I am a veteran of the practice. But, as I've gotten older, I have discovered there is just too much accumulating. Too many experiences. Too much emotion. Too much me.
       Too close to unraveling. Sometimes, just before drifting to sleep, I can feel all that is me making waves. Ready to drown.
       But ready to share? With people that care, face to face? Not yet. Hope it's not never.
       So let's bend the practice. I'll share me here. I'll be honest here. I'll move the inside to the outside. An intangible outside with intangible people that may not read and care even less, but that is ok. Because that is not the point.

       I just don't want to get liver cancer.

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